Scrum of the Earth /

It's impossible not to chuckle at Lote Tuqiri. As we sit down, instantly my eyes are drawn to his perfectly groomed dreadlocks and warm greeting. It's absurd. He's huge, standing 6 ft 3, weighing in at a nudge over 16 stone, and what's more he can chase down 100m in somewhere short of 12 seconds. Cripes! He gave Tom Varndell nightmares for a year.

This is bloke that shoved a team-mate to the ground mid-game because he took a wrong option, not to mention making a fool of a Wallaby selector via a rather contentious phone-call. Greats are supposed to be a little rough around the edges. Even for a State of Origin all-star, whose trophy cabinet might look a little NRL-heavy.

Embracing fatherhood and excelling in nappy changing aren’t exactly accolades but the 64-times capped Wallaby tells us he is just as proud of his family as leaving defenders in his wake. Starring on a government-backed DVD for first-time families, is it better second time around? And how’s touring affecting him?

“My new nipper’s about six months old now. It’s going well mate, a bit tough leaving home, but I’ve just had to get on with it and get back as soon as I can.”

What’s been the best thing?

“I like having a little play. I’m very much a touchy-feely type of bloke. It brings out child in me. I’m a very young boy at heart.”

And is the older one liking his new brother?

“He’s getting older every time I look at him but Samson’s the perfect brother. Besides the lack of sleep and the time difference as well, I wouldn’t change anything.”

Do you enjoy touring then?

“I just enjoy being with the boys. You get to hang around a good bunch of mates for a good amount of time. Not everyone gets to do that.”

So what do you do to get away from all the noise?

“I’m a bit of a lounge lizard, a couch potato, so as soon as I’m home, I stay home.“

Do you find it tough being a professional sportsman?

“I’m in a dream job. If you asked me what I wanted to do when I was younger it would have been to be a professional rugby player. You get to do a lot of nice things, like meeting the queen the other night was awesome.”

And you get to do a spot of modeling…

(Laughs) “That was just a bit of fun.”

Do you enjoy the limelight?

“I’d rather let the Drew Mitchell’s and Matt Giteau’s of this world do that stuff but I’m just bringing out a website…

We’ll get some link exchanges…

“That’s be good bro… sweet, thanks very much…”

No worries. Let’s go back to Fiji… Do you get back much?

“Just once a year. I miss mum’s cooking.”

Is family the most important thing in your life?

“Yeah mate. I miss that family chat, you know the way they know how to make you tick, so it’s always good to have them around.”

And your mother had a heavy influence on your rugby career?

“My parents were very religious. Sunday’s a holy day so I had to go to church. It prevented me playing for a while, up until I was about 16, but it stood me in good stead. I’m quite grounded and it keeps me focused, so I know what’s right from wrong.”

What were your earliest memories of rugby?

“I remember going to watch my dad playing. Do you remember they used to have those old corner flags?”

Sure.

“We used to play sword fights with them and take each other out, so that’s one of my better memories.”

Who have been the greatest wingers you’ve come up against?

“I just missed out on Jonah Lomu, so I’d have to say Ben Tune and Joe Rokocoko. He’s been at the top of the pile for a while.”

So what’s your secret?

“You have to go looking for work rather than being flashy and getting the last pass, which is good, but you’ve got to get in there and take the heat off the forwards and have some good defence.”

And having a good diet helps?

“I’m actually quite lucky. My metabolism’s good - ‘touch wood’ - I’ve got good genes. I know when to stop.”

Any temptations?

“My vice is a good bowl of good chips. The fish and chips are great over here.

You seem to have everything under control but does anything frustrate you?

“Judgemental people get on my wick a little bit. Just by their look but that’s about it.”

Cheers Lote. Best of luck getting fit.

“Cheers mate.”