Scrum of the Earth /

Read all about it! 15-year-old weighs in at 33 stone. Hardly the political line we like to take on a Friday, but apart from talking about Posh, Rooney and Boobies, it’s big news in The Sun. Here’s a few other things you can look forward to this weekend…

What you might see?

35 illegal Bolivian immigrants turning up on your front door
David Milliband practicing first Prime Minister’s speech in his bathroom mirror
Rafael Nadal serving up Andy Murray’s arse on a plate
Robbie Deans receiving a hero’s welcome in Auckland
Journalists planning the quickest route out of China

What you won’t see?

People giving a second thought to the Big Brother eviction
Verne Troyer AKA Mini-Me picking fights with females
Michael Vaughan booking his flights to the West Indies for February
Joey Barton becoming the new face of Children In Need
Graham Henry being offered an extension to his New Zealand deal