Nathan Sharpe: 'At least the teletubby isn't starting...'
It's been a pretty quiet build-up, which generally coming from South Africans and Australians is like using Britney Spears and Mother Teresa in the same sentence.
No bickering about scrums, moaning about referees, nor punch and judy - it's been.... rubbish!
Dingo's Wallabies get there first taste of Tri-Nations action. Full of vitality, fresh impetus and raw talent, not to mention the southern hemisphere's most prized head, it's a question of whether the ideas meet the philosophy.
If South Africa win, it''s goodbye Tri-Nations 2008 for the Boks have three home legs to look forward too. They've selected a guy at hooker who isn't renowned for his throwing. Just going by his first name, Schalk, South Africa will hope he's just as much of a flaming nuisance as his tear-away 'blondielocked' namesake.
As if Nathan Sharpe hasn't got enough on his plate coming back from injury and contending with Bakkies Botha and Victor Matfield, he's got James 'one-eyed' Horwill for company. The young pup must step up and not go looking for a scrap.
The Boks will be slowing ball down to nullify the threat of George Smith, who's like a spoilt child insistent upon no one else touching the ball. Schalk Burger, Juan Smith and Pierre Spies will have to work doubly hard to penetrate the physical Wallaby line of defence marshaled by a bruising back-row trio.
Butch James needs to keep his eye on the ball and not Matt Giteau's upper-regions. He might not register too much against the tape measure but his marvelous talents bely his stature.
If James has the extra-pressure of keeping the sundries ticking over this time around, Giteau is Australia's gem. The beach bum plays off the cuff, which makes both him and the Wallabies extremely dangerous and unpredictable.
On paper the inexperienced 9-10-12 axis might look a little lightweight, but Robbie Deans is no fool and both Luke Burgess and Berrick Barnes have formed able wingmen for Australia's world class fly-half.
Both team selections point towards an open game. Conrad Jantjes will run from deep while Messrs Habana, Ngungane and De Villiers aren't much cop with the boot - Deans has never been much of a fan of shelling possession either, so it looks promising.
South Africa won the World Cup without beating their two southern hemisphere neighbours, so there's a score to settle for the world champions.
They emphatically ticked one box last weekend and should do the same again in Perth.
Australia: 15 Adam Ashley-Cooper, 14 Peter Hynes, 13 Stirling Mortlock (c), 12 Berrick Barnes, 11 Lote Tuqiri, 10 Matt Giteau, 9 Luke Burgess, 8 Wycliff Palu, 7 George Smith, 6 Rocky Elsom, 5 Nathan Sharpe, 4 James Horwill, 3 Al Baxter, 2 Stephen Moore, 1 Benn Robinson.
Replacements: 16 Tatafu Polota-Nau, 17 Matt Dunning, 18 Hugh McMeniman, 19 Phil Waugh, 20 Sam Cordingley, 21 Ryan Cross, 22 Drew Mitchell.
South Africa: 15 Conrad Jantjes, 14 JP Pietersen, 13 Francois Steyn, 12 Jean de Villiers, 11 Bryan Habana, 10 Butch James, 9 Enrico Januarie, 8 Pierre Spies, 7 Juan Smith, 6 Schalk Burger, 5 Victor Matfield (c), 4 Bakkies Botha, 3 CJ van der Linde, 2 Schalk Brits, 1 Gurthro Steenkamp.
Replacements: 16 Adriaan Strauss, 17 Tendai Mtawarira, 18 Brian Mujati, 19 Andries Bekker, 20 Ryan Kankowski, 21 Ruan Pienaar, 22 Peter Grant.